Chapter 92: Lin Xi, I'm Sorry

The night Lin Chen left was the most chaotic, most unbearable night in Qin Yu’s memory. Just moments before, the corridor had been empty, but after a single phone call, it was suddenly crowded with people.

The first to arrive was his second brother, who had already been on his way, coming to keep vigil with him for their eldest brother that night. Then came a group—Lin Chen’s commanding officers and comrades. The sight of those iron-willed men weeping uncontrollably was unforgettable.

Afterward, Bai Xu arrived, along with Lin Chen’s uncle and aunt, and other elders from the compound. Strangely, the only ones missing were Lin Chen’s grandfather and Lin Xi.

Lin Chen’s grandfather was in poor health, and his uncle hadn’t decided how to break the news. As for Lin Xi, her uncle hesitated as well. Lin Xi’s situation had just begun to improve; her temperament had grown a bit more cheerful. No one dared make that call to her.

Not even Qin Yu.

For the first time, he felt truly timid, unable to speak when faced with Lin Xi. Yet someone had to make the call—Lin Xi had a right to know.

He spoke first with Lin Xi’s uncle, who had learned of Lin Chen’s situation the day before but was abroad and wouldn’t be back until tomorrow. After a moment of silence, the uncle asked, “Have you notified Xi Xi yet?”

“Not yet.”

“I’m still in transit and won’t arrive in Beijing until morning. Right now, Xi Xi only has her grandparents with her, and I worry she won’t be able to cope alone. Qin Yu, are you available?”

After a pause, he replied, “I’ll go and bring her here.”

He never forgot how, when the call connected, before he could speak, Lin Xi asked haltingly, “You’re not coming to my birthday? Qin Yu, it’s been so long since you visited me...”

Her words came slowly, out of nervousness—he was used to it, but at that moment, it felt like torture.

She seemed about to ask something else, but he didn’t address it, only steadying his voice to call her name: “Lin Xi.”

“What’s wrong?” She sounded frightened by his serious tone.

“Let’s not celebrate our birthday this year, okay?”

All sound on the other end of the line ceased.

After a long silence, she asked, voice trembling, “You’re not coming?”

He would come. Not just tomorrow—whenever she needed him, he would go. But he knew, once this call ended, the decision would no longer rest with him.

The emergency stairwell was shrouded in deathly silence, dim and cold. He leaned against the door, gripping his phone, his voice so hoarse he barely recognized it as his own.

“Lin Xi, you’re at home right now, aren’t you? I’ll have someone bring you over.”

He still couldn’t bring himself to say it outright.

To save time, he asked a friend in the neighboring city to escort Lin Xi. During the two hours he waited for her, he stood at the hospital entrance, watching passing cars, wondering how he would tell Lin Xi.

Bai Xu came out to find him, kicking at the pile of cigarette butts at his feet. “Is she coming?”

“Mm.”

“Did you tell her?”

He didn’t answer.

Bai Xu pressed, “Have you figured out what to say? Or should Uncle Lin do it?”

Bai Xu was anxious, too. No one had anticipated Lin Chen would leave.

They hadn’t told Lin Xi about her brother’s critical injury at first, because the situation was dire and, before the rescue efforts yielded results, her uncle felt it best not to worry Lin Chen’s grandfather or Lin Xi.

After all, Lin Chen was Lin Xi’s only support.

The surgery had gone well, and during the first two days of observation, the doctors said Lin Chen’s condition was stable. Qin Yu had planned to bring Lin Xi to the hospital after her birthday, just one day later.

He rarely saw Bai Xu so nervous. “We didn’t let Lin Xi see her brother one last time. Will she resent us?”

“Though... we meant well, still, we were wrong, weren’t we?”

They both knew, even if Lin Xi was sensible, this would leave a rift between her and them. Because apart from her elders, Lin Chen was her last close kin.

Just recently, she had said her birthday wish was to write Lin Chen a letter—asking whether it would affect him, if she could send it, if someone would receive it.

He’d promised to help her find out.

Now Lin Chen had returned, but then, he’d left again.

“I don’t know how to explain it to Lin Xi, and I doubt she would listen anyway,” Bai Xu muttered beside him. “Will she hate us for life?”

Lin Xi arrived with her grandparents. Her grandparents seemed unaware, but out of concern, came along.

When she got out of the car and saw the hospital’s name in bold letters, she anxiously asked if her grandfather had taken ill again.

Bai Xu said no.

She asked about her uncle and aunt next, as though using process of elimination, listing them one by one.

Finally...

Her eyes were red as she looked at him. “Is it... is it... my brother?”

“It’s your brother,” Bai Xu answered.

“He’s out of town, isn’t he? What’s wrong with him? Was he injured?” Her words came in a rush, no hesitation this time.

Bai Xu fell silent.

Lin Xi grabbed his sleeve tightly, turning to him.

“Your brother was seriously injured during a mission. Three days ago, he was transferred to Beijing for emergency treatment. At first, the doctors said his condition was stable...”

“And now?” She looked at him, the light in her eyes flickering, on the verge of collapse. She was so clever—just by watching his reaction, she knew the truth, but couldn’t bring herself to believe it, hoping against hope for what he would say next.

He never wanted to disappoint her, but this time, he had no choice.

That day was a nightmare for Lin Xi.

For him, too.

Midnight had passed—it was already her birthday.

No one remembered; no one cared, not even herself.

Everyone was consumed by the grief of Lin Chen’s departure. Lin Xi had cried herself unconscious in the corridor.

She was still just a child, with so many beautiful stories waiting for her at this age.

Yet she had to watch her loved ones depart one after another within a single year.

She couldn’t accept it.

Just as Bai Xu feared, when Lin Xi learned they hadn’t told her about Lin Chen’s injury right away, the look she gave them was filled with unmistakable hatred.

Her uncle tried to explain, but her emotions overflowed; she couldn’t hear anything.

“Uncle,” Qin Yu gently shook his head, hoping to give her space to grieve.

Even if, in the end, her anger was directed toward him, he didn’t mind.

The corridor was much quieter now than it had been hours before.

Lin Xi sat crying in the corner, her shoulders shaking. Qin Yu walked past everyone and sat beside her on the floor.

No one knew how to comfort her. He raised his hand, then lowered it, repeating the gesture several times before gently nudging her head so it rested on his shoulder.

“Lin Xi, I’m sorry.”