Chapter Twenty-Two: If Death Awaits, Let Me Dunk!
“In fact, what I’m really good at is slam dunks!” When Geng Haoshi shouted out these words, every player on the court stopped what they were doing and stared at him in astonishment.
“Did he just say he’s good at dunking?”
“With that belly of his?”
“Is he even one seventy centimeters tall?”
“In our team, only Captain Meng Lang, at one ninety-one, can dunk. Even our small forward Zhu Di, who’s one eighty-six, can’t manage it. And this short, chubby guy says he can dunk?”
The players all around whispered and murmured, convinced Geng Haoshi was bluffing.
Damn, this has gotten out of hand! Now every player is watching me, the beautiful coach is watching me… It’s over, it’s over, it’s over. My goddess Mimi! My 36D! My 34E! My 1666 yuan!
Yu Manman looked at the pudgy guy before her, who was even shorter than she was, and found him all the more amusing. She said, “Alright! If you can dunk, I’ll let you be a starter!”
“A starter?!” The five main players were startled, but in the next second, they all relaxed; after all, none of them believed Geng Haoshi could really dunk.
Geng Haoshi was completely flustered, at a loss for what to do… Wait, there was still 9527’s “Power Condensation”!
“9527, bro’s going to cheat! Give me ‘Power Condensation’ right now!”
“…Master, you just used it last night, and you want to use it again today? Aren’t you afraid you’ll lose control of your bladder and bowels right here?”
“I’m only dunking today, can’t you use a lighter version of ‘Power Condensation’?”
“Master, if it’s ‘light,’ is it really ‘Power’ Condensation?”
“…Come on, can’t you at least try to control the intensity?”
“…Alright, Master… but I can’t guarantee the effect.”
“Stop rambling, just try it!”
“…”
“9527? Is it ready?” Yu Manman and the other players saw Geng Haoshi muttering to himself and looked completely bewildered. Geng Haoshi felt uneasy.
“…It’s ready, Master…”
“Ready? Then why don’t I feel that rush like last time?”
“Master, you asked me to control the intensity, didn’t you?”
“But why isn’t there any feeling of cheating at all?!”
Despite that, seeing Yu Manman’s growing impatience, Geng Haoshi could only grit his teeth and pick up the basketball…
He held the ball tightly in both hands and charged towards the hoop… “What kind of posture is that? Is he playing rugby?” Watching Geng Haoshi run toward the basket like this, Yu Manman and the players were baffled.
“Ah—!” Geng Haoshi yelled loudly, supported the ball with his right hand, and leapt—“Bang!” He flew past beneath the hoop and crashed headlong into the main support pole of the basketball stand.
“…Yu Manman.”
“…The other players.”
“…9527.”
Dizzy, stars spinning before his eyes, Geng Haoshi staggered to his feet, feeling a bout of vertigo.
“You fat idiot! Is this your so-called slam dunk?” Yu Manman clenched her fists and shouted.
It’s over, it’s over, it’s over… No, I can’t just get kicked out like this, I need an excuse, that’s the only way… “Coach, my stomach still hurts, it’s affecting my performance,” Geng Haoshi said, clutching his belly. “Let me get a feel for it first.”
“…Fine, I’ll give you five minutes… You’d better not be messing with me! Otherwise, I’ll whip you first and throw you out after!” Yu Manman snapped her whip hard against the floor twice.
Seeing Yu Manman’s furious expression, Geng Haoshi hugged the basketball, his right hand absentmindedly rubbing its surface. “Hehe… heh, let me get a feel for it first.”
“…Master, are you fondling ‘the ball’ again?”
“Fondle your own! …Why is there no